Connection failed, please try again

Oh, Einstein, if you only knew…

In this day and age, most of us spend long periods of time in front of screens. COVID-19 magnified this phenomenon by making nearly every face-to-face meeting virtual. In a matter of weeks, therapy, doctor’s appointments, staff meetings, school days, celebrations, support groups and church services were all being held online, with people connecting through screens and microphones.

Has our technology exceeded our humanity? What if our humanity now largely takes place over a screen? What if our human connection is through an Internet connection? What if technology IS our humanity?

As a teacher, I see it play out dozens of different ways each day. There are a wide spectrum of meetings in education and student support. Now, when I participate in Individualized Education Plan meetings, they are online. When I refer a student to mental health counseling, the student meets with the therapist online. When a student needs help from an academic counselor in navigating the college admissions process, that support is online.

I work with a population who is much more receptive and partial to in-person learning and support. Walk me through it. Show me how to do it. Not to mention that hot spots and wireless connectivity are marginal at best in some areas so any attempt at virtual teaching ends up in frozen screens and distorted, delayed or garbled voices. Or the fact that many times, a student won’t, doesn’t care to, or can’t even log on.

I’ve been fighting what I feel is the good fight since this all began. I volunteered to go back to school early with my cohort of teen parents because they rely on the childcare services to be able to get their schoolwork done. They don’t have the support they need at home, so they come to school. And I am there when they arrive.

But I feel my argument for human connection, and face-to-face instruction losing steam. Not because I don’t believe in it. But because this tool we are using to do life now seems to be becoming the norm. Do I need to adapt and play along? Do I need to redefine my relationship with technology? Is humanity now found through technology?

In the meetings mentioned above that are now online, people share sensitive information. Personal information. Confidential information. This information is all recorded by third-party companies that make the meetings possible. Just one more way our lives are being recorded and collected. Are we supposed to get comfortable with this? With knowing that whatever we say is recorded and transcribed and therefore, accessible? Is humanity being lived out through technology also impacting our concept of privacy? I know many people who are not yet ready to trust..

Or am I being paranoid?

Back before the virus that caused a pandemic that caused a tsunami of demand for conducting life virtually, technology seemed at best a tool, and worst a time-suck. But now, we are forced to live out much of our lives online. We used to spend our time scrolling through social media, comparing our lives to our friends.

Now we look into people’s homes and glimpse their lives in real time, during work hours, doing work things. We can spend all day participating in one meeting after another, or teaching class after class in our pajama bottoms at our kitchen table with a smudge of syrup from breakfast sticking to our laptop. Technology is in our homes, in our kitchens, in our beds…and it’s how we work and how we live.

Then, when we finish the work day, it is screens for our personal enjoyment. I have more than once caught the five of us sitting around the television in the living room after dinner while each of us scrolls through our personal devices. Oh, the humanity.

If you’ve read this far, you may be disappointed to read that I don’t have the answers. In fact, I have way more questions than answers. Like, when are we going to be able to do life together again? Will technology replace in-person meetings because it is cost efficient? Will people continue to work from home and use screens all day because it is more cost efficient? Will screen communication replace person-to-person communication? Will technology replace humanity?

I feel that I should keep fighting the good fight. The fight for face-to-face connection. If only for the simple fact that we cannot love one another through screens.

We can still be safe and responsible and meet in person. Counseling sessions can be face-to-face if you can sit socially distanced and wear masks. Same with teaching in small groups. Or meeting in smaller groups, in bigger areas, or outdoors.

We can still pull the plug on Zoom meetings and plug into what our neighbor needs. We can browse in a bookstore or have coffee with a co-worker. We can still turn off our screens and step out into the real world, with real people and connections that aren’t just virtual. Can’t we?

Is this too much to hope for? That humanity becomes a thing again?

I hope not.

17 thoughts on “Connection failed, please try again

  1. clairei47 says:

    I am really hoping this is not the way things will go. I’m absolutely exhausted with staring at the screen. I think many of us are desperate for face to face human interaction and as times goes on, the virtual world will be used to our advantage but will never replace the joy and intimacy of true human contact and connection. Let’s hope not anyway. Xx

  2. Lovie Price says:

    i waver on the whole thing..probably something like a long term prisoner feels about leaving for the outside world when his debt is paid to society.Some days i loathe the screen and other days i am grateful for it. I think maybe part of this whole isolation thing is turning me into more of a recluse than i already was. Hopefully this changes.

    • gr8ful_collette says:

      Yes, I feel the pull to hole up and hide away now as well. It would feel great to have the sun on our bare faces and be able to hang out like the good ole’ days though! Xx

  3. The Quitter says:

    I was speaking to my daughter (aged 22) who was talking about generational changes in The Counter Culture. In my day, it was, to choose one form, punk rock. Which merged to incorporate technology: cyber punk. But this rising generation, the young teens, who view Big Tech as evil, are scoring credibility on being either lo-fi, off-grid, or crafting social media profiles that are masks of recycled content that broadcast Big Tech back at itself on purpose. They seek an active anonymity. Anyway, that’s a little off-topic from what you were saying, but I guess I wanted to say the youth are always fighting back and trying to create the world anew!

    • gr8ful_collette says:

      That’s an interesting point… maybe it’s the younger generation who will end up pulling us out of this mess! Thanks for reading!

  4. Just Teri says:

    You’ve just penned my greatest fears 😳

    I too don’t have the answers but believe awareness and sharing this with others is our best hope for human connection and privacy to stay paramount in our lives. Prized and coveted for the specialness it actually is.

    Kids today just don’t seem to get it and perhaps it’ll be the job of the “boomers” like us to educate and inform them of what they’re ignorantly giving up 😩🙏

    I join you in fighting the good fight ❤️

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