Remembrance of Things Past

Yesterday, I slid down the slippery slope of memory and floundered around at the bottom like a bug on its back. Normally, I don’t allow myself to dwell in the past. Much of it didn’t go as planned, and feelings of guilt and regret are all too happy to pounce, once I arrive. This trip Read More

The Yuck

Disclaimer: This post is not one of my usual hope-filled messages, but I feel the need to be authentic with my readers. Read on to learn more about my current affliction, the Yuck. Last week, the majority of California went back into lockdown due to COVID-19. My district informed me that we will be starting Read More

Life Lessons from my Garden

Let me begin by admitting I am not a master gardener; I consider myself a student of plants, a novice at best. But it brings me satisfaction and pleasure to putter around in the garden, whether it’s tending to my tomato plants or trying to propagate my succulents. I am an observer; maybe that is Read More

What to do? Give Yourself a Break

“What are we going to do today?” This question has no doubt been asked far more often over the past four months. Prior to the arrival of the Virus That Cancelled Everything, schedules used to be packed, trips planned and looked forward to, and staying at home doing nothing was a rare occurrence. Now that Read More

Autopilot: an unfulfilling ride

Get up, get dressed, eat breakfast, go to work. Come home, cook dinner, do chores, go to bed. It’s easy to get stuck on autopilot in this life. If you’re caught in the sticky trap of drinking, your life is likely a recurring nightmare of numbing, regret, broken promises and feeling like crap (physically, mentally Read More

Creating Sober Associations

Today is my birthday….I’m celebrating the midpoint between 40 and 50. Celebrating Independence Day, and my personal freedom from alcohol. I’m with my family at Mammoth Lakes, also where I celebrated my 40th Birthday. That birthday trip was filled with booze and its sidekick, regret. At 15 months sober, I still have a lot of Read More

Coffee Talk: Trying to connect with sanitized relationships

Yesterday, I went out to coffee with two dear friends who I haven’t seen since March. We’ve shared virtual interactions–sanitized relationships–but I hadn’t actually seen them in person for months. We shared stories about our kids and spouses, concerns about our jobs and the economy, dismay over the state of our nation, frustrations over our Read More

Disconnected

A week after my husband’s return, we took my daughter in our RV on a camping trip in the woods. Rest and relaxation. A beautiful spot with mountain air, a meandering river and a cathedral of trees. I knew in advance that this location had no Wifi or cell reception; I just didn’t realize until Read More

This One’s For You

Hi There, I’m writing this for you. The one who feels stuck. Like a bird in a building, or a mouse on a sticky trap, Knowing that things won’t end well. I’m writing this as the voice of experience. One who has been there before, But managed to break free. And now wishes she had Read More

The Sun Returns

Late Sunday night, my husband walked through our front door for the first time in seven months. My daughter cried, and cried, jumping into his arms. The dog danced circles around him, full of puppy elation. My boys–his stepsons–stood around with the happy aloofness of teenagerhood. And I felt like the missing piece of me Read More