Dear Husband,
I feel like year 11 should have come with a warning label. WARNING: You will be physically separated by 7,000 miles for seven months of this year. Life as you know it will change in big and small ways. You will feel lost, anxious, discouraged and frustrated a majority of the time…
But the warning wouldn’t have helped. This year has humbled us with the realization that we really have SO little control over our lives and what happens.
However, there is this little thing called hope that exists in all hearts that love another human. A stubborn optimism that as long as you are here, things will work out in the end.
This year taught me that “here” isn’t always a physical space, but a presence. One can be with someone despite their absence. I think that’s how you really know you were meant to be together. When the connection goes so far beyond physical space and time.
So I can look at this year with anger and resentment over the bitter things we had to endure, or I can look at it as the year I discovered the true meaning of hope.
Hope always exists, where there is love. But it fluctuates. Sometimes hope fills us and even overflows. We have such an abundance that we toss it about extravagantly.
This year, hope was an ember I had to sustain with my breath to keep it alive. With something that small and precious, you go to great lengths to keep it glowing. It is your desperate priority. What are you doing today? I’m keeping hope alive.
Hope says, I am with you even when we are apart. Even when things are hard and you feel alone. Hope says, things will work out in the end.
So I walk into a new year with you physically, emotionally and spiritually. I don’t know if it will be any easier (from the looks of things, probably not). But I do feel the tiny ember growing once more into a flame. A flame fanned by the assurance that we will get through this life together, even in times when we’re apart.
I know now that I can do this hope thing, even when it’s fragile and anemic. But here’s hoping we have many years of extravagant hope ahead of us.
Love,
Your Wife and Fellow Life Traveler
This is lovely. I hope he has read it. I have to be really honest Collette, it made me a little sad and envious as I don’t currently feel that hope within my marriage. It’s our 17th wedding anniversary approaching and I’m not sure my letter would have the same sentiment. I’m so very pleased that he came back after you having to endure that extended time apart. It much have felt so hard. You are so strong and pretty darn awesome ❤️🤗💕xx
Thank you, Claire. I know what’s it’s like to be in difficult spaces within a marriage. The balance it takes to grow together and grow ourselves is so tricky and sometimes perilous. I’m trying to appreciate everything as it comes, the good and the bad, as I feel it has much to teach us. I appreciate you so much!
🥰
Beautiful. Consider yourself fortunate! Having that kind of love in your life is special and sometimes rare. Happy anniversary to you and yours!
Thank you, Janet. I do consider myself fortunate. Even though it’s not all roses, it’s a journey I’m glad we’re both on together. There’s as much to learn from the difficulties as there is to enjoy in the ease. 😘💕
That is so beautiful. I’m so pleased you have that love and he will be absolutely beyond happy to have someone as wonderful as you in his life. x
Thank you so much. 💕
collette , this is beautiful..the expressions and sentiment are so sweet and thoughtful.I am often in awe of those who are able to maintain/sustain a long time marriage or relationship. I personally am probably a serial killer when it comes to intimate relationships.As I’ve posted i am in a new one again and am praying fervently that this one will stick. My longest one was 10 years ( but that was only one- most were less than 2 years). I am hoping , too, that with the changes i have made and patterns i realized were sabotaging things, that it will be a smoother ride at the very least…much love and congrats! Gorgeous picture too!
Thank you, Lovie. For you, it’s so important that you’ve identified a pattern of sabotage and now you are doing the work to change things and develop healthy patterns. I wish you the best of luck with your new relationship! 💕
Happy Anniversary! I can’t begin to understand how hard it would be to be separated for so long. So that is a testament to the love you have for each other!
xo
Wendy
Thank you. It was really difficult but you and I both know that good things came and do come from struggles. This has definitely made us appreciate our life together more, and has made me a stronger person! Hugs to you. 💕
This is Beautiful!