We are wired for stories because we live them. We love hearing others’ stories because they help us make sense of our own. As human beings on this planet, we get to experience all the things: heavy and light, beautiful and difficult, hopeful and uncertain.
Our stories are usually a balance of difficult versus easy, although we tend to fixate on or take note of the hard situations over what is simple or beautiful.
But if our story and most of the scenes in it include alcohol, we start to view and live our lives through a different lens. The light is more murky and fleeting. The beauty around us is faded, or overlooked completely. Lowered expectations put a damper on our sense of hope.
When this happens, the scales that balance our experiences and perceptions become out of balance. The heavy is too heavy and outweighs the light. Difficulty overtakes every aspect of our day from the significant to the mundane (how can making breakfast on Sunday morning turn into such a monumental task?). Uncertainty hops into the driver’s seat and takes the wheel while hope is a shriveled specter in the rear-view mirror.
If we are writing our stories by the actions and behaviors we perform everyday, it is possible for our plot lines to change.
Eleven months ago, I realized I was no longer the heroine of my own life story. That the antagonist I introduced to add dramatic flair and comic relief hijacked the plot and drowned out my presence completely. I knew in the deepest part of my soul that I needed to take back my story.
If we can write misery and shame and self-loathing into our story, then we can also add a plot twist that includes redemption and healing and fearless authenticity.
We can write light into our stories; unfiltered moments with our children and partners. Holidays with special traditions where we are engaged and connected.
We can add beauty…so much beauty. Scenes that include new adventures and vistas. A warm hand on a star-filled night. The calming lull of honeybees in a bed of lavender. A painted sky melting into the ocean. Scenes that include acts of kindness and service to others. It is beautiful to get outside ourselves. To reach out a hand and pull someone up. Raw, real, uninterrupted beauty.
And we can write a story where hope plays a starring role and uncertainty is just an extra that fades into the background. Hope in a life where we are present for ourselves and others. Hope that in each day we are able to recognize and participate in moments of delight.
By putting down the bottle and looking at life through a cleaner, clearer lens, we are writing a whole different story for ourselves. People may say, “I didn’t see that coming.” And we can say that only the best stories include an unexpected twist.
We are stories still going…is it time for your plot twist?
Collette, seriously this is so spot on! Oh my. You summed everything up I’m feeling about getting sober just perfectly. I feel it but can never get it into words like this. Thank you for sharing this with everyone and inspiring me🤗
Thanks so much, Dwight. I’m glad this resonates with you, and that we share connection through our stories. 💕
Yesssss. What Dwight said😊
Thank you for reading! 😊
Yes, also ready for my plot twist! Lovely. ❤️
Yay! Write that story! Thank you. 🥰
Stories are like air and food, we need our stories and they help us make sense of the world as you say. Doing our blogs is part of our collective story and mine has taken me in some totally unexpected places that’s for sure. Interested to see where the plot twists take us. Jim x
Yes, so true! Thank you, Jim. Xx
You’ve almost made it a year! Congratulations. This is a really great reflection.
Thank you, Kimi!💕
I’m writing my story Collette. It’s changing and developing and opening doors every day. So beautifully written and such meaningful words. Thank you for sharing xx 😘
Thank you, Claire! Yes you are! More light than heavy, more hope than uncertainty and more beautiful than difficult! 🥰
Thank you. That’s so lovely x
That’s lovely ❤️ Thank you xx
I love how stories can be written as we go.And rewritten! My journals and diaries are proof that the endings were not written in stone…i get to choose! Beautiful and poignant !