My daughter climbs into bed with me at 4:30 am, after awakening from a nightmare. She cuddles up against me and I stroke her hair, telling her to go back to sleep. Not minding that I am now up for the day. Glad I can be, in this moment, a comforter and a protector. A Read More
Tag: drinking
Sunnier skies
Last night, my husband told me about a coworker who is having trouble at home. He and his wife are arguing frequently and it’s taking a toll on their marriage. My husband asked if alcohol was part of the equation and he admitted that it is a nightly thing for them. He then suggested that Read More
Odd Woman Out
Yesterday, our school staff had a catered lunch to celebrate one of our co-worker’s 60th birthday. She was just returning from major surgery and mentioned that she can’t do drugs (pain medication) but “gin and tonics helped.” (Many laughs and nods). The conversation that played out among the group had no fewer than half a Read More
What Keeps me Here
I’ve been thinking about the processes of starting and stopping, sliding and progressing, and even completely falling off the path. While the desire to move forward in a positive direction seems to have been planted somewhere deep inside, motivation is at best a flakey companion. I’ve had periods of time, okay decades, where I felt Read More
Musings from a sober anniversary
Last weekend, we spent our 12th wedding anniversary in San Francisco. We stayed at the Mark Hopkins, and took in a Giants game and the Immersive Van Gogh Exhibition. In between the two, we had appetizers and drinks at the Top of the Mark, the place where my husband proposed. This venue, with its panoramic Read More
Stops and Starts
You stop: Waiting for next time to be different. Waiting for five o’clock Waiting to feel better. Waiting not to feel. Waiting for “good times” Waiting for “me time” Waiting to celebrate Waiting to live And you realize that: It is different Every hour is significant You do feel better Feeling is part of life Read More
Nestled in the Center
Soul is a place, the innermost Russian nesting doll. Anne Lamott, Dusk, Night, Dawn This beautiful line by one of my favorite authors struck me with truth and sent my imagination on a journey. Through the stages and seasons of our lives, our souls remain nestled and protected in the center. Layers accumulate, not reliably Read More
Don’t Lose Your Balance
For most of my life, I’ve struggled to achieve balance. I’m always somewhere outside of centered, sometimes far off and sometimes just missing the mark. I can visualize the perfect day, the perfect month, the perfect rhythm, but putting the picture into practice is always elusive. If one area of my life is running smoothly, Read More
I Know in My Heart
There’s a difference between telling yourself something, and knowing it. My brain, and I venture to guess yours too, offers a steady stream of commentary to either pay attention to, or reject. Thoughts about things I observe, how I feel, what I think I want. Most of it nonsense, really. This is also the commentary Read More
My Issue
As most of you know, I am in a situation where someone close to me remains in the hospital after going through alcohol withdrawal and liver failure and now is trying to get well enough to enter rehab. I had a conversation with my mother-in-law about this situation and she made a comment that really Read More